Holy smokes he sounds like bad news all the way around. He is a classic serial cheater. You have absolutely done all the right things in not playing his games and leaving him to the mess he's made. If you ever take him back I am sorry to say you can expect his patterns of lies and cheating to continue indefinitely though. I am trying really hard not to call him some bad names but he deserves all of the ones that come to mind and probably some new ones spoken in the hulls of pirate ships after several pints of rum.
I'm asking this in all honesty because I'm not clear from your posts: do you want him back? If so then you've got to lay down some hard boundaries and enforce them. NO conversations with other women, PERIOD. FULL TRANSPARENCY of his phone, email and social media accounts. That means that you have all his passwords and are free to check his conversations whenever you want. Sounds harsh? Well cheating is way more harsh and a cheater has to work hard to earn back the respect they've destroyed. This is the LEAST he can do to earn a shred of trust back. Serial cheaters behave like juveniles and often have to be treated as such.
Do not believe ANYTHING he says! It's all going to be lies, misdirection and gaslighting engineered to get what he wants. If he wants to earn your trust back it can only happen through actions, not words. Case in point he always promises to break it up with OW "later". What the hell is that supposed to mean??? You've got to commit yourself to him 100% and THEN he'll break up?? No, HE needs to break up first BEFORE approaching you about recon. He's being absolutely ridiculous.
