Here’s the thing... you don’t NEED your wife... you WANT her. That is not the same thing. What would you do if she had passed away? You would grieve for a period of time and then you would pick yourself up off the ground and get on with building yourself a new life. You would do this because you would have no choice. This sitch is no different only your W isn’t dead which is a blessing, isn’t it?
So true. I would never wish death on my XW but I've mentioned here before that I can't help but think that death is easier to get over than BD. Your loved one isn't coming back from death, no waiting to see what will happen. It's final. You accept it, you suffer and grieve and learn to deal with it and move on. We go through almost exactly the same process after BD but it's so much harder to let go and move on because we don't know if things are truly over or not.
Quote
She is not marrying my H. That man no longer exists.
That's a great way, and really the only way, to look at it!
Quote
There is a future out there for you. Not the one you planned or counted on but a future nonetheless
Exactly. And we can choose to hate it and be miserable, or we can choose to make the best of it and enjoy the new and different future. But in the end, which path we go down is OUR choice and not our spouse's. They can temporarily knock us down, but if we stay down then that's on us, not them.
