I've read those. I think it's easier said than done. It's hard, in some cases keeping some bills combined is less expensive for me and I need that right now.
I have a lot of conflict between my brain and my feelings right now. I know rationally (thinking with my brain rather than my heart), limiting contact to business matters is the right thing to do so he doesn't keep having the benefit of me being there plus whatever he is getting from these other relationships. I also know that these other relationships he has going he is probably not committed to either or else there would not be more than one going on.
Feeling-wise, because I haven't heard anything from him other than responses to business items it kills me because it makes me feel like I don't matter to him or he just doesn't care that we are not talking or seeing each other. So right now, it feels like what I'm doing is hurting me more than showing him that I'm not always going to continue to allow him to take from me without giving back. It is also hurtful to see both of those girls posting on his facebook page and I feel pushed to the side. I've not seen or spoken with him since the end of May other than a few emails about business items. I'm not sure how long it takes someone to feel the loss of another if they are using relationships with other people, drinking, and other avoidance techniques to distract themselves. He is also very good at compartmentalizing.
I have been wallowing in self pity some recently and feeling really sad. So many things others have described about their situations prove true with mine that I do believe he is going through MLC. It's seems so clear from the outside but it's hard to understand there is nothing to do but let him work through it. Along the way I've seen moments of clarity here and there but it's like he can't reconcile within himself on a path forward. As I mentioned previously, I've offered the option of proceeding with a separation agreement or dividing up things and he has insisted he is not done with our relationship but he also hasn't recommitted or stopped maintaining the other relationships. I asked him when we were talking in May if that is what he wanted moving forward, relationships with multiple people and he said it didn't make him happy and he thought a relationship only included two people but he couldn't explain why he keeps on maintaining that status quo.
