You are doing wonderfully. We have to backslide to move forward. One needs to process the new info and keep sorting out and all the rest. It is the path to acceptance.
Your H and OW on your mind: He blamed you with his “you should have tried more”, blah blah. Do not take on his blaming. All those maybes - maybe he should have tried more. No maybe about it.
I’ve got more to say (imagine that) and miles to drive. Take care of you and kids. You are on a good path. Will talk again soon.
DnJ
Feelings are fleeting. Be better, not bitter. Love the person, forgive the sin.
