Try not to over analyze every move or comment that your wife makes. They all say and do things during the crisis that may or may not give you hope. Your wife knows that you love her and deep down she also knows that are a great husband and father. However, until the depressive fog lifts and she faces her childhood issues, she's going to be floating around for a bit.
As for advice from others, she may or may not listen to that advice. Sometimes, they will not continue to connect w/people who give advice. Hopefully the friend was gentle in giving the advice and really just listened to what she had to say. The key here is to listen and allow her to talk.
Dig deeper for patience and continue to keep the focus on you.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
