Heartbroken and Struggling - Part 2

[AnotherStander]

When the BD first happened to me, I had trouble being away from my wife. I had a lot of trouble staying focused at work. Now I am feeling worse being at home. I know that this is because I am not detached. My emotions are completely controlled by my wife's mood.

It's OK, these feelings are normal. You'll get there, just keep motoring forward!

I think that the hurt eventually is what is going to allow me to detach. I am starting to feel that I deserve better than this.

Once you process the hurt then the healing and detachment kick in. And yes, you deserve better! We all do!

However, I still live my life for her.

I'm curious what you mean by that? I would say that while I loved my XW and she was a very important part of my life, she wasn't my WHOLE life. I have always lived for me, as all people should. (EDIT- well I don't mean that all people should live for ME hahaha! For themselves ) If you don't love yourself, and live for yourself, and focus on your own health and well-being then you will never be able to love someone else effectively.

AS, I think it was you that recommended that I look into RC planes. Well, I have been watching a lot of Youtube videos, and I think I am going to buy the Cub S Scout. The one that will land all by itself. Where do you fly these planes?

Is that by Horizon Hobby? A lot of their entry level planes come with "SAFE" which is a feature you can toggle on or off that makes the plane basically fly itself. So if you get into trouble you can hit the switch and it will stabilize. Or you can fly with it on the whole time and just let go of the sticks if you get in trouble and it will self-level. The Horizon Hobby planes are complete packages with charger and everything, and they are mostly assembled. They're great options for learning. If you do crash and break something usually you can use C/A glue and be back flying again in minutes.

I have an acre lot and can fly most of my planes, multirotors and helis right in my backyard. That's mostly what I do. But the bigger stuff I'll take to the park or one of the area schools to fly (I always find an area where there are no people walking around). When you're learning it's important to find a really large area free of obstructions because it'll take you a while to develop the depth perception you need to keep from running into trees and such. Even if you have to drive a while to get there, it's best to fly your first several flights at a place like that until you get comfortable flying (and especially landing), then you can fly in smaller areas closer to home. Oh, also the first few times you fly try and go on a day when there is little to no wind just so you can get the hang of things. Good luck!