So this is probably the biggest update I'll have made since my first post...
I am just back from my divorce hearing. Took about 15 minutes tops. XWW was there in the same room with me for the longest since she left. Bottom line the magistrate approved her request and it will likely be signed AND I'll be officially divorced by Wednesday of this week. Not feeling anything about it to be honest. I guess perhaps because simply put it's my past and I've already been living my future for some time now. No big celebrations or anything like that. My atty did high five me, but beyond completing the finality of this chapter of my life it felt out of place. Anyway I'm done and in about 48 hours or so, a twice divorced single father.
AS/Nicole...thank you both for your comments on the situation with my new girl. Since my last update she invited me to bring my sister to her place of business for a concert this past Thursday night. She had not met any of my family as of yet and as my sister lives far from me, the two of them having the chance to meet would have been difficult. We showed up, I introduced them and then my GF kissed me which surprised me given her texts to that time. We had a great time, my sister and her hit it off and as we left my GF and I kissed multiple times as well. Those actions on her part tempered my "WTH" is going on. Each day since my GF has texted me in the morning to tell me that she has been working like crazy. I reply in time to each of her texts, answering any questions she had, validating the stress she expresses to me about her work and then wishing her a good day.
Having been on this site, thankfully I have not been at all needy with her, no texting her all the time, "where are you?", stuff like that. I reply when if/she texts me and then otherwise I'm living my life, working on my new house and letting her be. No idea what will come of this, but I'm staying centered in myself and just moving me onward. I truly do hope she and I continue this relationship as I believe it has lots of wonderful potential, but I accept it's completely out of my hands. As with my XWW I'm letting her be as free as she has asked for and only time will tell. Sitting there at the courthouse this morning, thinking about this I said to myself "ya know if new girl isn't interested in continuing with me, then by all means please feel free to let me go, as I don't want to ever be sitting here again as I am now". And that's it really.
This morning I gave up D4 for the week. Then I went and gave up/ended my 2nd marriage. And I might be ending the new relationship that held so much promise before I want it to. I have had all kinds of love leave me and yet I've ENDURED. Perhaps that's what DB is at its core. Learning that no matter what heartbreak/hell you may have to go through, you by yourself are enough and can endure anything that comes at you.
Just want to thank all of you again for your support since I've been on here. Never had a single chance to save my MR so instead I saved myself. Not sure what awaits me going forward as I wrap this up, but I'm content, happy enough, have a family that loves me, a new wonderful home and above all the love of the most amazing little D4 I could ever imagine.
