KML, about the PTSD - I've had others mention that to me before. Maybe I do have it. Hard to believe that someone could damage another person so badly.
I'm not totally against or avoiding a new relationship....I'm just not looking for one and am fine if a new one doesn't come along.
Maybe a therapist could help me, but I really don't feel like digging up all that stuff again.
DnJ, yes I need to quit living in fear....need to stop worrying about something that I can't control. Very difficult to change my way of thinking. Will obviously take some time.
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From what you’ve said I see three fears - a break up (projection of your relationship), not getting to see the baby (abandonment), and having heart broken (hurt and pain).
BOOM. Yep. All three.
I've had abandonment issues my entire life. My parents divorced when I was 4. I was tossed between parents and grandmother the entire time growing up...always getting pushed onto one or the other...my stepdad was military and we moved every 2-3 years without fail. The only stable thing in my life was....my marriage. (Or so I thought.)
As for the hurt and pain:
That's interesting. I seem to be over emotional in some areas (animals, babies, innocent things) and ice cold in others (relationships.)
Make any sense?
My grandmother used to tell me to not worry about things I can't control.
Easier said than done.
bttrfly, thanks for the hugs.
Tad (Still can't believe that I'm posting here.)
Currently: M 57 XW 58 Sons 39,34,32,30
The Sitch: Married 26 years EA w/ OM 9/10 Bomb 10/10 (5 weeks after 25th anniversary) Sep 12/10 She wants D 1/11 W files 5/11 D final 10/11 XW marries OM 6/13
