If not for the kids I would have at least separated and possibly D'd her years ago. The desire of keeping a family intact is so strong in me, I couldn't do it.
Ain't that the truth? It is also the reason I am still willing to take her back. One thing I find interesting is how time and space works. The point of DB is that the WAW will come back to her senses with time and space and realize what they were missing in the MR. On the other hand time and space makes the LBS realize what they were putting up with in the MR for the sake of keeping the family together
Time and Space. These elements have played huge roles in all of my significant R's prior to getting M. Thinking back about it, the R's in my life all read like script now when it comes to the impact of Time and Space, whether I was the dumper or the dumpee. I have been thinking about posting about these R's to journal and maybe illustrate that these 2 elements are so powerful.
My first real R was from age 19-22. My girlfriend was a knockout and the R was fiery and passionate. The intense love of teenagers. We talked M and babies and a life together. My 2 best friends were ready to tie me up and sit on me to stop me from buying a ring at age 20. I was mad about this girl.
So a few years went by and I was doing the college thing, living on campus, and she was living with a relative and trying to get into the fashion industry. She had no interest in college. I got deeper and deeper into campus life and it started to become apparent to me that we were moving in different directions with our lives. I saw it, felt it, and wanted out and to be free and do the college thing to the hilt. I broke up with her and broke her heart, she still saw us together forever.
I fell off the face of the earth, didn't contact her at all, until one day about 6 months after I dumped her I ran into her at a gas station near campus. She looked incredible. Old feelings started to creep back. We caught up a little and as it turned out we still had a few items of each others, so we agreed to meet up a few days later at her place to do an exchange.
In the days before the meet-up at her place, my feelings for her continued to come to the surface and I wanted to give the R another shot. Maybe I made a bad call in breaking up with her. We had a lot of history and most of it was great. So I'm headed to her house to apologize, lay my feelings on the line, and get her back. The Time and Space from her cleared my head, and when I saw her and talked to her again the feelings were right there.
So we met up and I made my heartfelt pitch, and she said no. Not interested in a R with me. Said she had cried for months and hoped for recon but she was done crying and had moved on. She was dating a guy and was into him and wanted to see where it went. (she ended up marrying him....then D'ing sometime later...) So it was my turn to be crushed. I had her, and I let her go. I blew it. I was the dumper coming back for another shot, and she was the dumpee who had already moved on by then. Time and Space at work.
