My Story Part 3

[Manta]

Journaling 23/06/2019:

Hi all, it's almost a month since my last post, still, I have no update or heard anything from my WW.

It's over 4 months since she last contacted me, in relation to solicitor's details. I was expecting that time to get some form of legal documentation, however nothing.

She's living with her AP in Germany and started a new job a few months ago and is still with him afaik.

I'm beginning to accept more than likely she will wait until the 12 months separated is up, then file for divorce. So perhaps August/September I will be served with divorce papers.

I have accepted the situation now, while it still hurts and not a day goes by I don't think about what happened, I'm focused on being the best I can be.

I have finished restoring that old car. I have lost 22 pounds in the last year, reconnected with my old friends again and have succeeded in all my work projects. I have gone for a nice holiday to Spain on my own and have recently booked another holiday in July. Gone to a few concerts and had a lot of fun. I'm busy with hillwalking, kayaking and meeting new people. I'm 36 and know my life isn't over.

I'm still standing for my marriage in my own way, but I feel my WW is so determined to show everyone she made the right decision by leaving me, she won't turn back....yet... But natural circumstances will fall, if they haven't already.

I just want to say thanks to you all for helping me in the last 10 months.

It's affair season now, where dates are aligning up with last year, the first time they kissed, had sex and DDay. It's all on the way in the next few weeks. It does trigger me, as i remember all of these milestones.


For those who have recently found out their WH or WS is having an affair and has left them, let me give you some advice.

Things do get better. You will get through this and become stronger. It's not easy and it's like a rollercoaster of emotions. Keep busy with GAL/ 180's and detach. It's all you can do, your WS is lost right now and in a very selfish state.

You can't change their feelings or the decisions they're making, but you can take control of your story.

Be selfish for yourself and love yourself that little bit more. Enjoy those moments with family and friends.

Don't beg, plead or lower your integrity by trying to fight with your WS. Be strong of course and stand your ground and implement boundaries. This is very important to protect your emotional wellbeing and show your WS you won't be disrespected or walked over.