Are WASs typically nice to their Hs? Except for telling me ILYBIANILWY and that she is not physically attracted to me, she has been very nice through this whole thing. In my post above, it was her idea to go on this family sporting outing last night. She still texts me about her day. ARRRGGHHH, I get so confused.
I can't speak for anyone else. Mine is not. She is a raving lunatic, she is playing the victim card at every corner, she used the nuclear weapon of abuse in court, etc. Reasonable and amicable to her means that i give her whatever she demands; if i don't then it is my fault we are here again. Moving past the constant blame is tough.
The only thing that is consistent is that i am the root of all of her problems. Everything else swings wildly back and forth.
I have improved my listening skills, my mindset, and my interactions with her. The anger from her has subsided a little, the demands not so much. The anger comes back whenever i don't agree to her demands. She calls it standing up for herself; i call it acting like a selfish B. Not to her face of course. We can agree to disagree.
She did dig through some drawers and get some old pictures of the kids that we didn't give away(wallet sizes) from 5-8 years ago and put them in a folder and gave them to me for fathers day. The expectation was that i would be super thankful and so happy that she went out of her way to do this for me. She was mad at me for not giving her a mothers day gift.
LB55. Im just curious? I don't like the idea of "negotiating with terrorists" lol ... if their "demands" are unreasonable. When your W is "standing up for herself" I can understand the perception about the "acting like a selfish b" part, even under all the niceties to your face, by their actions. I have to ask. Is it possibly because she feels overpowered, or talked down to from past interactions from you when M was good? Or is it because she is being coached by some type of encouragement, empowerment, or influential group? Or has her heart just turned that cold? Are her demands that unreasonable?
My problem is the difference between words and actions. She will say she wants me to spend more time with the kids. Then when I ask for more; she says that she isn’t comfortable with the idea of me getting any more time with them. She told me a 50/50 split will not be considered, it isnt fair to her and the kids. Told me that I am lucky to get my 4 days a month from the judge. She asked the court that I get 2 hours with them once a month with supervision from CPS. The judge thought that was preposterous.
She told the court that the minimum she needed to get by on was $9000 a month. She doesn’t work.
She told me the only way we aren’t going to court is if I agree to give her all 3 houses we own together. If I don’t I am taking away her income (rental homes) and that isn’t fair to her. She isn’t open to negotiation unless it’s her plan and I accept it. If I disagree in any way I am being unreasonable.
Her best friend is a divorced mom that retains 5 different lawyers and lives in a waterfront home. Doesn’t work because she collects so much fromex husbands. They hang out all day and figure out ways to make life harder for me and laugh at me when I struggle(I don’t actually know this but I feel that way). [/quote
Originally Posted by LB55
Originally Posted by IHCLACS
Originally Posted by LB55
[quote=Destroyd]Are WASs typically nice to their Hs? Except for telling me ILYBIANILWY and that she is not physically attracted to me, she has been very nice through this whole thing. In my post above, it was her idea to go on this family sporting outing last night. She still texts me about her day. ARRRGGHHH, I get so confused.
I can't speak for anyone else. Mine is not. She is a raving lunatic, she is playing the victim card at every corner, she used the nuclear weapon of abuse in court, etc. Reasonable and amicable to her means that i give her whatever she demands; if i don't then it is my fault we are here again. Moving past the constant blame is tough.
The only thing that is consistent is that i am the root of all of her problems. Everything else swings wildly back and forth.
I have improved my listening skills, my mindset, and my interactions with her. The anger from her has subsided a little, the demands not so much. The anger comes back whenever i don't agree to her demands. She calls it standing up for herself; i call it acting like a selfish B. Not to her face of course. We can agree to disagree.
She did dig through some drawers and get some old pictures of the kids that we didn't give away(wallet sizes) from 5-8 years ago and put them in a folder and gave them to me for fathers day. The expectation was that i would be super thankful and so happy that she went out of her way to do this for me. She was mad at me for not giving her a mothers day gift.
LB55. Im just curious? I don't like the idea of "negotiating with terrorists" lol ... if their "demands" are unreasonable. When your W is "standing up for herself" I can understand the perception about the "acting like a selfish b" part, even under all the niceties to your face, by their actions. I have to ask. Is it possibly because she feels overpowered, or talked down to from past interactions from you when M was good? Or is it because she is being coached by some type of encouragement, empowerment, or influential group? Or has her heart just turned that cold? Are her demands that unreasonable?
My problem is the difference between words and actions. She will say she wants me to spend more time with the kids. Then when I ask for more; she says that she isn’t comfortable with the idea of me getting any more time with them. She told me a 50/50 split will not be considered, it isnt fair to her and the kids. Told me that I am lucky to get my 4 days a month from the judge. She asked the court that I get 2 hours with them once a month with supervision from CPS. The judge thought that was preposterous.
She told the court that the minimum she needed to get by on was $9000 a month. She doesn’t work.
She told me the only way we aren’t going to court is if I agree to give her all 3 houses we own together. If I don’t I am taking away her income (rental homes) and that isn’t fair to her. She isn’t open to negotiation unless it’s her plan and I accept it. If I disagree in any way I am being unreasonable.
Her best friend is a divorced mom that retains 5 different lawyers and lives in a waterfront home. Doesn’t work because she collects so much fromex husbands. They hang out all day and figure out ways to make life harder for me and laugh at me when I struggle(I don’t actually know this but I feel that way).
LB555. I almost spit out my coffee and slammed my fist on the dashboard of the car after reading that! (Don't worry I'm parked.) Talk about entitlement complex!!! I think you need to invest in some additional propery consisting of wooded acreage and a backhoe....lol... Reading things like that really light a fire under my @$$ about how good men get ruined financially by their ex wives. That is beyond unreasonable its absolutely insane!!!
