I truly think she had doubts in the end but it had gone to far. She bought a house told her parents and spent a lot on lawyer fees.
Ultimately I think this is what will prevent R between me and W. There was a moment during the last stages of the D process where it was obvious that she wanted to give this a second chance. I could see it clearly in her eyes and body language that she was close but she could not pull the trigger and let everything go forward. In her mind she has gone too far to second guess her decision. She has convinced herself that this is the right decision so she is going to overlook anything that says otherwise. She walked across the bridge and burned it in her mind and swimming back against the tide is going to be hard.
Originally Posted by LH19
M,
When we told the kids like most things in the process it wasn’t as bad as I imagined. My ex cried and my daughter cried. My son didn’t say much. My daughter asked if we would ever get married again and my ex responded “I don’t know”. My kids struggled a little early on but have adjusted fine the last 6 months. My ex and I are very amicable we sit together at games and events and I’ll joke with her sometimes. I don’t get personal with her but will talk about kids, weather etc.
This is encouraging. I am confident about moving on from her but breaking the stable family for the kids is what has been giving me nightmares. Hoping that my kids will also be able to cope. I am told kids are resilient and I should not worry. Let me hope that is the case.
Originally Posted by LH19
M,
If she came to me today to reconcile I’m not sure what I would do. I feel I should at least have one relationship first to see if I just want what I can’t have. Been dating for about 9 months but nothing lasted more then 3-4 dates. Not sure if I’m too picky or not ready or what’s up. I just made a date while typing this out lol.
I know what you mean. Being picky is not a bad thing at least when you get started. Good luck on your date - maybe she is the one
Originally Posted by LH19
M, RESPECT is the key. If your ex has it for you then you will have a chance. It’s just probably not going to happen on your timeline.
She definitely respects me more than she did over the past year but its going to be a steep hill to climb for R as you said. For now I need to keep working hard on detaching or it will drive me crazy
