Tell her there are some things to do BEFORE you even entertain getting back together:
1st, couple's therapy. Tell her you want to start once a week or twice a week couples therapy. Find a good therapist that has experience in reconciliation.
2nd, do some things together with S and her as a family. Again, weekly or every other week. Zoo. Park. Movie. Dinner. Make it about spending time together as a family. Nothing romantic. This is to see how committed she is, and to see how she behaves all together.
3rd, NO dates. No sleeping over. No romance until you give 1 and 2 a few weeks. This is called easing into the water. You know, like when you slowly get into a pool to get used to the temperature. Do not jump in all together. And do not put dating and romance above the hard work and healing that must come first.
Finally, DBing works! SO remember your learnings. Detachment (self-differentiaion). Restudy that subject again. Make sure you keep a healthy self-differentiation into your next R, whether with her or someone else. Keep your 180s. And continue to GAL!
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
