This is especially sums up what I've been trying to say on here for weeks, without being labeled as a misogynist, behind my previous hurt and frustration how the sexes think and love differently in today's western society. The societal, mortal psychological, emotional, and social differences in what is fueling the high divorce rates today. You can respectfully agree or disagree with it but it's worth the read if anyone is interested? Its a good article.
Didn't read it all. IHC obviously a lot of things have influenced the state of marriage in Western society. I don't really want to get into the politics of all of that, especially since a more traditional view of the issue is viewed as politically incorrect. I do not agree that your researching these things makes you a misogynist. That is an ugly word that is thrown around way too easily today. But I do agree with others that laying the blame for the failure of your marriage solely at the feet of this type of thing is short-sighted. And sets you up for failure in the future.
The truth is, those pressures may or may not have contributed. Maybe you two were a bad match from the beginning. Maybe you didn't love her as deeply as you should, and therefore your bad behavior caused it. Many men marry women to "lock in exclusive sex", only to be unhappily married years later. Only you know the truth, and even then you may need serious IC to get to the real truth.
Regardless, not working on it and must moving on and filing for D is a cop out on the WAS's part. One expert I've read since my latest sitch put it this one: Instead of trying to find someone to love, love the one you found.
One thing that was interesting in that was the chart on remarriage. I read another anti-divorce expert that specialized in why women cheat. (Men cheat too, but this particular female author was concentrated on the fact that women initiate most Ds and that they usually have moved on with someone new before doing so). She wrote a book on the subject from the point-of-view of consultation she did with a woman that had BD'd her H, asked him to leave the house, and was engaged in a torrid affair with a younger man. One of her points to this woman was that eventually her H was going to give up, move on, and remarry. She asked this cheater if she was ready to see her H do that. She was not. (The mindset of the WW!) The author pointed out to her that 2nd marriages have an even higher D rate, and that it is easier for divorced men to remarry than it is for divorced women.
Of course the book ended with her not wanting to end the affair, but also not wanting to completely cut her H lose. The wayward is the most selfish creature on the planet!
Last edited by Steve85; 06/18/1912:38 PM.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
