As long as there is an affair, she is still in replay, PERIOD. Anything can send her right back to early replay (or other phases). I am not an expert but I would assume your only bet on a chance of her staying is after acceptance, AND you have both decided to dedicate everything to saving the M. Early reconciliation will lead only to disaster.
From personal experience, do not try and guess which stage they are in. It will only hurt you. For me, I thought for certain my W was headed out of replay. Her EA had been continuing (in secrecy) despite our reconciliation. I had been convinced she was in the clear and of sound mind. When I found out I asked her about it and it threw her right back into the tunnel at full force. Separation soon followed. EA turned PA and we are divorced 6 months later. She has lost her close family, the respect of friends/community, her home, her loving husband and continues to be with OM.
Start GAL and planning a new and wonderful future for you and the kids. Regardless of what occurs, you will be mentally prepared for the outcome. MLC folks have untapped stamina and will wear you down for a very long time. As seen in many instances here, they will stop at nothing. They will destroy anything and everything while on their journey. Protect yourself and the kids emotionally.
