Sorry if I sounded too alarmist, its just alarm bells go off in my head when guys are doing what you are contemplating because I see them years later and they feel like they sold their lives away for nothing. So, maybe you trust her, but I don't!
So, how about this - try to separate issues into three completely separate mission areas. You should approach each mission completely separately, because if you don't you will be overwhelmed, out of control and not accomplish anything. Guys do better, feel better, are better, everything is better when you have a mission you can tackle and accomplish!
Write down a list of specific actions you can do to in each mission area. Make schedules, arrangements, budgets for each action. This should be a checklist that you go through one by one, and at the start of each day you should have a list of which actions you will achieve that day, and then go out and nail them.
I will even cheat and give you some common actions that I have seen work well:
Mission 1 Unchien improvement: This is all about focusing on being the best you, the best father, healthy, a strong performer at work, a fulfilling hobby/social life.
Find a fun thing to do with and to teach your kids every single day, google fun, new stuff like making up a ridiculous sport, kazoo concerts, pancake decorating contests, sidewalk chalk art gallery. Document all of this in a journal. Take and share pictures. Eat well, learn to prepare healthy simple meals, cut out unhealthy stuff, get into heavy lifting and HIIT, ideally something social like crossfit. Improve your wardrobe, research or find someone other than your wife to help you dress 2 levels more formal and 10 years younger. Look for social interactions, join meetup, make an effort to be more outgoing, start conversations in line, ask people questions about themselves, smile and look them in the eye. Talk to your Dr about TEMPORARY anxiety or SSRI meds if absolutely necessary. Stuff like this.
Mission 2 Legal/business accomplishments: This is all about custody, child support, spousal support, work requirements, asset/debt division, long-term child costs. Your mission is to be a confident, financially successful, involved father. You will guarantee that you are and always will be the father figure for your kids, financially independent and secure. So, get separation agreements in writing, ideally filed, but at minimum well documented. Make sure you are not on the hook, nor are you setting precedent for anything you are not comfortable continuing from a custody or financial standpoint for 18 years. Write down long-term financial and career plans, and define what financial success means to you. Is it a fancy house, vacations? How will you pay for college, retirement. How will you improve your career? Can you take an online certification or learn a skill that prepares you to do the job you want to accomplish these things.
I can promise you that forking over your fatherhood and financial security as some sort of olive branch/trust exercise is not going to achieve anything good for mission 3. In fact, it only results in you lowering your value as a viable relationship option.
Mission 3 Relationship stuff. This includes reconciliation/divorce, regaining her trust, helping her feelings etc.
