Based on how my XW and I communicated we did not put anything formal into place but when she moved out we came to a financial agreement on our own and custody arrangement. If my XW and I could not come to an agreement or I felt like she was not considering my best interests as well then I would have pursued something formal.
TBSakaJ9 - Thank you for your feedback. It sounds like you went through a process which I hope to do as well, but need to tread carefully.
What did you have to agree on financially during your separation?
Custody is my priority right now. If I feel like she is not considering my best interests on custody, it will be a huge red flag. So far this is a work in progress. It's complicated.
During the 6 months, we have summer (kids out of school) and fall (S7 and D5 in school, D3 in pre-school 2 0.5 days a week where the parent has to go). W is planning to go back to work PT.
I want to come up with something that accommodates her work plans, my D3's pre-school schedule, and D5/S7's after-school activities, and yet meets my custody goals. W has agreed to share her detailed schedule plans so we can discuss this in detail. She also agreed to my request to take the kids on vacation this summer, which helps with the natural imbalance because they are at home all day every day this summer. It also depends when I move, I may take some Friday's off, etc. At least as of today, I think we can work something out. But it needs to be done before I move. I've been quite clear that I need to be comfortable with our plan for the kids in order to do this.
Financial I don't really worry about. We agreed to run large expenses (above a fixed dollar amount) by each other. We don't plan to split accounts, etc. Not to be crude about it, but we are both saying we are willing to spend a large sum of money to attempt this separation. Financially it's bad for both of us. She would be better off today if she went straight to D. She could demonstrate more custody, and zero income. So again not to be crude, I'm fairly trusting on the financial stuff. Money is traceable, etc.
