SteveS - I caution you to avoid targeting specific outcomes. That is classic NGS behavior - doing something in the hopes of achieving a certain outcome from another person.
That being said, if I was in your shoes (and I kind of am if you read my sitch), I would want to reach a point where I was calm and collected and confident in saying: "I am filing for D, because whether we R (my hope) or D, I will be a happier healthier version of myself." Yes, filing is alpha behavior and may be best for your sitch... you are the expert on your sitch, tailor advice as needed.
I guess the other reason would be that you feel this is your only remaining shot at R, in which the separation is a waste of your time and emotional energy. Again, you are the expert on your sitch... and honestly even in that case I don't think anyone can know whether R is possible.
