Forget about saving your marriage Uni. There is absolutely nothing you can do to save it at this time. They have to want to save it on their own volition and choice. How do you achieve that? Simple. Give her so much space that she has to question her own thoughts and actions over a period of two years seperated. Be consistent. Positive, negative (as little as possible.) Or indifferent. Minimize emotional interactions as much as possible, unless she brings them up. Stand your ground and don't allow yourself to be manipulated, whether intentional or unintentional. Challenge your perceptions and beliefs and hers, if the situstion arises. Step back from yourself and be an observer in all this. Remove your attachment. Make concise logical decisions in what is best for you and kids. Go out and GAL. Try to subdue compulsive thinking. Meditate. The mind is a tool and will go crazy looking for solutions we don't have the answers to until it finds what it wants. Rest it and the thoughts and the clairity and peace will follow. Accept as much of the present as you can handle. Make peace with the whole sich. Make peace with yourself. Let her go, and let the old you go. Avoid denial. It just keeps us stuck longer, think if other ways you can better cope and be more grounded emotionally. Go for a walk. Do anything to interrupt your mind. If your body is not moving, your mind most likely is. Make your improvements a conscious habit for 28 days. Anything else I can think of that will help I will add.
