That's the problem with the theory, I think. I don't think people are 'wired' in one set way - or at least, that's not my experience. I am anxious with H, secure with a small handful of close friends, extremely avoidant with my parents... before H I had one significant relationship with a good man and I'd say we were both secure (until we both kind of lost interest, which was interesting...). H is obviously my primary attachment figure despite all my efforts at detaching, and my head is so anxious when I am in the room with him it drives me (and him, no doubt) nuts.
