Thank you Steve, I understand completely that this might not be the first or last time I make a stand or feel ready to move on. I often change my mind frequently about whether I actually do want him back or not, so I can in a funny way understand my H's confusion. After 9 months the lows aren't so low and the highs aren't so high, I had a good cry and a rage today and they were partly due to tiredness and hormones but mostly due to me feeling that H is taking the mickey waltzing in and treating my home like his home when he unilaterally decided 9 months ago it was no longer his home. Right now I'm angry, but this is one thing I will not let slide. I won't act out of anger, I'll drink the STFU smoothie for a day or two and then work out how to tactfully tell him this won't happen again.
I have already forgiven H for a lot. Not ready to forgive him this yet, that'll take work. But this boundary is going in.
