It is often said here, that inaction is an action in itself. You said yourself that this hurts like hell (and it does) but it won't always. Get to a place of calm then make a decision.
Is there anyway you could spend more time with D. You mention your W is not that interested in being a mom.
Originally Posted by Rooney
My basic feelings are still that I am the only responsible adult in this family and yet I have allowed myself to be manipulated, bullied, controlled and tossed aside.
There is a lot of anger and resentment in the above. And I get it. I was there too. But, until you step away you will not be able to get past this and move forward. As you said, breath and be patient. You will get there. Until then, be the responsible adult. If your W won't step up, then you be both parents. Your child deserves it.
My youngest is 9. What she needs is to feel secure and loved, preferably by both parents. You can't make your W be a good mom, but you can make sure you are the best dad you can possibly be. Little things, like calling every night you are not with them at the same time (routine) lets them know that no-matter what you are doing and where you are, she is in your thoughts, taking the time to ask the questions about her day so she knows she matters, and when you are with her, be present. The last is truly one of the things that has come out of my sitch which has been positive. When I am with my children I am with my children - because I don't have to worry about anything else (I do everything else when I am not with them).
