I don't know what the assertive thing would have been to do there - I can't really co-parent healthily with him if he's dishonest and plays games about what he does and doesn't want, and tries to manipulate what he wants out of a situation rather than asking for it.
The assertive thing to do was whatever felt right for you at the time and then to stick with it. If I had plans, I would have told my H "I am dropping youngest off at 6:00 as planned". If I did not have plans but wanted the night to myself I would have said "I am dropping youngest off at 6:00 as planned". If I really wasn't that bothered and quite fancied an evening in with my children, I would have said "I don't have plans so am happy to keep them tonight". Be the author of your own story.
Originally Posted by AlisonUK
But I can also understand that he was very very drained and perhaps not in the headspace to deal with an energetic child at the end of the day. Ah well.
Seriously, Alison, [censored] him. This is what it means to be a parent. Rain, hail or shine, we get up off our [censored] and parent our children. I have a tract infection at the moment, am under stupid amounts of pressure at work, and I got myself out of bed this morning to make the kids breakfast and help them get ready for their club. Would I have preferred to stay in bed a little longer, absolutely. But I didn't. I don't expect a medal for this because this is what it means to be a parent.
I will however, be going straight back to bed when I finish this entry as the kids are at their clubs for the next two hours
Can I ask a stupid question ... why do you want to be with a man like this.You deserve so much better. Give him space to become better and carry on with your life in the meantime. You don't need to date. You just need to live.
Yes - the weather is terrible. Housework and cinema for me today.
