I am on the same boat as you. Every time i feel ok with things, i hear a comment from one of the kids that triggers me to the core.
Yep. I get it. I'm doing pretty well, but sometimes I get triggers that p!ss me off or make me sad. Sometimes, it will be a comment from one of the boys, or a movie or a song....anything really. Maybe the triggers will always be there....
??
They say that forgiveness is for us but, I can't do that yet either. I don't want to live the rest of my life being bitter, but can't forgive just yet.
The thing that bothers me an awful lot sometimes is the time that has gone by. This all started two weeks before my 43rd birthday. I'll be 52 in October. THAT bugs me. I feel like so much time has been wasted. I realize that I moved a little slower than others on this site and it took a lot of time for me to get where I'm at now, but I sometimes feel that I wasted so much time on HER.
That makes me angry at myself.
Tad
Currently: M 57 XW 58 Sons 39,34,32,30
The Sitch: Married 26 years EA w/ OM 9/10 Bomb 10/10 (5 weeks after 25th anniversary) Sep 12/10 She wants D 1/11 W files 5/11 D final 10/11 XW marries OM 6/13
