I realized today that I've started to dream again. I haven't had any dreams (that I remember) since the BD and now in the past few nihts I have had dreams. I don't know psychology but I'll take it as a good sign.
I'm so grateful for all of you who help me daily, not by just answering my threads, but posting your own. It gives me comfort knowing I'm not alone in this.
I'm going to talk with a lawyer when I go to my hometown tomorrow. Since my husband filed for the divorce in the country where I am from, all the proceedings have to happen there. I've asked him many times if he's talked with his lawyer about alimony. I know he has no idea how much he is going to have to pay, and I know he will probably be upset when he finds out. And this is something I will not back down from, I will take everything that I legally can. I put my career on the backburner, so he would have the freedom to pursue his. And when he gets where he wanted to be, he leaves me.
Yes, I think I'm in the anger state of my grief now. But I figured it's better to vent here, than to him.
He is still being very nice, like today he's coming to drive S10 to a friends party even though it's my week with the kids, so it should be my responsibility. But he's also ignoring my messages about our daughters upcoming confirmation and the party for it. He is not attending the party, which is sad because the party means a lot for my daughter. I just need to make it a great party without him.
I feel better again, but it truly is a rollercoaster and I'm a bit worried about the length that this will take. But I'm trying to follow your instruction and live as if he's not coming back.
Oh, the best news, I got the DR book on Friday!!!! My S10 and D12 were with me when I got the mail, and both commented on how can someone be so happy about a book?????? I'm reading it now, and decided to read thru once and then read again and do the goals etc. Even though so far I think a lot of what I've read doesn't apply to MLC. Like in writing goals and making them short term. At the moment I can't ask anything from my husband, so scratch that, right?
Oh well, time to enjoy the sun and my kids. Have a great Sunday everyone!!!
On BD Me 39 H44 D14 D12 S10 M19 T19 BD 3/19 Separation 3/19 H filed for D 4/19
But I figured it's better to vent here, than to him. 