Thank you Alison. You’re right; the things he said confuse me and feel like a no win. And it does make me angry. It’s like he’s saying that I haven’t been vulnerable enough in discussing my feelings about all if this, except that I definitely was for a while, and when I have been vulnerable about it he has completely rejected me. It feels like I’m watching him try not to want our marriage. It’s gut wrenching and so frustrating.
And it is very hard feeling like we were getting along so well and having such a nice time together, and that it got blown up in such a negative way. I’d hoped to set boundaries around it on a positive note, not after an argument.
I should clarify one thing: we do have a regular arrangement for his visits with our daughter, and he never comes over outside of that. It’s just that for a while he was texting me before his arrival to make dinner plans, and when he stopped doing that his week and just shows up at his arranged time it felt like a shift back into coldness.
