Wow, what a crazy couple of days. I know this is a hard time to go through, but you are in the midst of change. All these years you've kind of been in limbo, but you are now in the midst of change. I think after this weekend (and a few days of settling), your life will start to normalize a little. Not that all problems will be solved, but you will be surprised at how much more peace you will feel with H out of the house. Your head will clear, your spirits will lift a little, and so will your confidence. Not in 1 day, but it will start happening. Part of it is the knowing that H isn't going to be there when you get there. Right now thats something that sits in the back of your head all the time...that he is there. Once he is gone and your mind drifts to home, a sense of relief will come with the realization that its your safe place again. I am sad you are going through this, but happy that you are making some forward progress. Just remember that we are all right there walking it with you!
Sorry auto-correct doesn't like sjohns. That isn't even the name I chose initially, it got truncated. The whole thing was sjohns63 because that was my login at work a few years ago, lol. I am far past the point of caring about anonymity. My name is Sam...you can just call me that if you want
