Yeah Steve I haven't been to the range in a year. I was actually doing the militia, getting plenty of range time and training prior to BD. W who is a liberal centrist. Anti conservative, didn't like that I was putting some of my focus into that, and it didn't make her feel safe. She thinks I'm a right-wing extremist which is further from the truth she just never gave them a chance even though we do a lot did a lot of good for the community and emergency eram and stuff like that, help out police, fbi, disaster clean up community outreach etc. She believes everything through the media about them being right-wing extremist. Her father was a vietnam marine but her family mostly Democrats. My wife actually like the idea of socialism. My father was also a marine but before Vietnam era he passed away several years ago. I was raised Democrats with the Unions in my family, but I turned conservative in 2010 and started getting very politically active. Another division between us because this country is so divided today, start playing a role in dividing our marriage. Me and my WAW, are like Ronald Reagan and Jane Seymour.
I guess one of my issues what's really is driving my rage at the thought of a blended family in the future. I don't want that for my son but I have no choice. She wants to raise him one way and I want to raise him another. Being as conservative as I have become I just don't believe in splitting up the family.
I think I think it's overdue for me to get together with my shooting buddies. I actually enjoy cleaning my guns more than I do shooting them, I haven't even looked at them since December. Another thing that pisses me off about W. I purchased her a pistol about 3 years ago. Was asking for 3 years to take her to the range to get a proficient on it for self-defense and home purposes. she never took an active interest and never wanted to go with me. Now all of a sudden she's expressing interest in going to the range with my younger brother's ex-girlfriend who is divorced.
I don't know who this person is anymore or who I thought she was. I know all the warning signs red flags Mental Health depression mlc and daddy issues were there, but yet she projects all those issues onto me. I wish sometimes I wasn't as an emotional person as I am. When I'm happy people know about it when I'm angry people know about it when I'm consumed people know about it and when I'm sad people know about it. It's my thoughts that are driving the emotions more than the circumstances. More like the thoughts of the circumstances driving the emotions. Therapy helps, I just feel like that I'm very unique and that there really isn't anyone out there for me so I can relate sometimes. At least not in an intimate way without letting your guard down. The reason why I have abandonment issues is because I've had four girlfriends and a wife leave me. Talk about a self-fulfilling prophecy. If they have weaknesses it's okay but if a man has a one weakness, just forget it they're done there is no long-term relationship. They will grind them down slowly over time in a marriage. If they are too Alpha then they're considered emotionally abusive, controling, manipulative, etc, If they are too Beta then they are considered a doormat. I know I shouldn't be discussing politics on here because there are a lot of good respectful people on both sides of the aisle and I understand that. I can be friends with people and agree to disagree politely. but it is in my most humble opinion that feminism has destroyed this country and the women in with their ideals. I do believe a woman should have her independence and they should have equalism in the workplace. What is far as relationships go a man and a woman will never be equal because they think differently they steal differently they do things differently, and they are built much differently. There are too many women running around today that have too much expectations of men that they themselves are unwilling to fulfil for themselves. There has to be a balance within the family. Steve I'm sure you know the divorce rates are initiated by 70% of women because they aren't happy for whatever reason whether it be midlife crisis depression boredom monkey branching, financial reasons, division of labor reasons comparing with the Joneses. Dissatisfaction and etcetera. in my opinion the only time a woman should have the right to release to leave a marriage as in the case of abuse and neglect, but they can turn their perception of their husband not paying enough attention to them as neglect, and their husband putting their foot down on a serious matter as emotional abuse. The divorce course need to change. other than having children there is no benefit to a man getting married in today's society. Women have too many choices today actually it's more than women it's everyone. I want to make marriage holy again and not legal. I know I'm coming off as a misogynist, but I'm not. I'm really starting to believe that women love opportunistically and men do actually love idealistically . Women don't respect men today, and men don't respect women. The division and understanding of the opposite sexes is just as divided as the political arena. Not all but most of the women identify with identity politics, emotion and cause. Not all but most men identify with logical reasoning and consequence.
I'm sorry if I'm renting but I had to get off my chest and thank you all for listening. I'm just really angry and sad at the current state of affairs in our country and the current state of affairs between men and women and the current state of affairs in my marriage, clearly knowing that there is something wrong in Western culture, and there is little that we can do about it it's just the way it is. It almost leaves me with a feeling of hopelessness that I will probably be alone as far as having an intimate partner for good amount of time of my life, because of the way I believe and think. Maybe I need to move to a different part of the country I don't know?
