Don't assume, ask her. Tell her you've spoken to someone that has gone and that while the idea of the program is helping people rebuild broken relationships, the purpose of it is to build stronger communication. Because that is EXACTLY what it is. No matter what happens to your relationship, you will end up better communicators. And if she is not both feet out the door it may very well save your marriage. If she is both feet out the door then you will know after going, because in it you will share a LOT of thoughts and feelings. You'll know exactly where she stands.
About those letters, I'm sure you know it now but those were terribly damaging. Both in content and in the method of delivery (letter instead of face-to-face discussion). If you feel the need to write more letters then by all means do so, but DO NOT give them to her. Write them and burn them.
