Well, I'm shocked. There was me thinking that my marriage had broken down because I didn't cook lamb dinner nor wear lipstick. I'll have to rethink now.
What a numpty comment but in the spirit of harmony we'll let it go!!
Alison, you are now going to have to box clever. You need to be very specific in your interactions or he's going to misread them. "do you want a cup of tea or any calpol for youngest"
It's good to be realistic but if you act as if you expect him to fail then it may be a self fulling prophecy. Live in the moment and try not to worry about if he's going to bottle it in a couple of days. I think it will come across in your body language and conversations.
But do stick to your boundary about the blaming and cruel talking. Tell him you won't listen to it and leave the room / the house / put the phone down whatever.
Nothing has to be said at the moment. Just get used to being in each other's space for now. Let him be and see that you are not going to force anything. He's fallen out of his boat, he's swirling in the rapids trying to hang on. Every time you try to get some rational actions and sense out of him, he doesn't hear the sense, just hears pressure to 'get back in the bl**dy boat"
