I still get upset when having to deal with ex or being confronted with memories.
It’s like seeing a ghost.
I don’t necessarily know if we are actually mourning something that was real though. It was real to us at the time. We loved and had the capability to love. But I don’t think our ex’s were capable of loving that way. I think we project the way we love and feel onto them. We think, “I felt love so he/she must have loved me the same way.” But I don’t think they just changed with a crises due to childhood problems. I think things were no longer easy for them and they were no longer gaining. So they bailed. When I look back, there were so many selfish things he did that just never registered. I bet most of these waywards were similar.
I think the battle is mostly with ourselves though.
