Hey Alison, I am so sorry about your friend, how tragic
I'm glad eldest and H got on ok without you there, hopefully now they have done that they can continue their dance without dragging you into the middle of it (and you can step back out of it too...)
You handled the criticism just wonderfully! I am taking notes here on how to deal with this situation like a proper adult...
I'm glad you had such a great time away, sounds like it was just what you needed.
And those are positive changes that your H has made to address problems in your M, but it's good that you're being realistic about what is possible right now without closing the door entirely.
Finally: thriving rather than surviving is BRILLIANT! Keep on going
