Curtis I wrote out a long post I deleted because it was too harsh and I'm probably the harshest poster here. You got to get stronger or this is going to end very badly for you. You have two boys who you have to teach not to be pushed around. Get into IC. Books and podcasts are not enough. You're very confused on what to do and you're not heeding the advice of the board and you need some guidance.
I have read number 5 on your list like ten times and every time I say WTF?
