Niall 2: Drifting Apart

[Niall11]

H"I will get a bottle of wine, if you XYZ for me"

Woman at bar "Will you buy me a drink??"
ME: "Yes, if you buy me one first"

PASS THE TEST. Gain respect

For a long time I had her respect. I am, and want to be, a generous and (dare I say it) "nice" person with those I love. I did have some NGS tendencies in the past and I've worked to eliminate the things like covert contracts. If I don't have time, or really don't want to do something, I say so now.

But if I do have time, I really don't mind running out to pick up a bottle of wine for my woman. For a long time my W was someone who didn't look at my kindness and see weakness. Somewhere along the line that changed. Now I'm on guard against doing nice things for someone who shows me such little consideration and such disrespect. I'm on guard against her getting the message that she can fire me as H, behave as she's behaving, and I'll still do those things for her.

And what I've realized is that I really don't want a relationship on those terms. The person she's become really doesn't appeal to me and there's little indication the "old" W is coming back. If I've spent months struggling, it's because of my D2. I want what's best for her. I never thought it was D, but I don't think the status quo of loveless cohabitation is sustainable either. I'm mostly angry that W didn't figure out before we had a child that what she really wanted was to stay out half the night on the lesbian party scene.