Persistent Endurance (Part 3)

[curtis7]

Hit a major birthday milestone today, signature line updated. Woke up to the kids bringing me a bag of hand painted crafts and magnets, t-shirt, and handmade card with stick images of the three of us. That put a smile on my face...and theirs, we were all excited. Gosh I love my kids.

No gifts or even a happy birthday wish from my W as of yet. I started thinking what I would want from her and these things came to mind: a long loving hug, a passionate kiss, sex, a commitment to end her affairs, desire to move home, agreement to attend Retrouvaille, an apology. Any of these would be appreciated. I accept that none of this is going to happen today. I’m okay with that and will continue DBing.

I’m planning to take the kids to a Japanese Steakhouse tonight with my parents. The kids will enjoy the hibachi show in front of them. Last night, S8 asked W if she wanted to go to dinner with us. He did this on his own. She said maybe. Her choice, I’m fine with it either way.

I’ve been keeping busy getting the house ready for my birthday party this week. Pool deck, lanai, and front walkway paver blocks are sealed with a nice wet look finish. Pressure washed the driveway. Assembled a new patio set last night for additional outdoor seating. Still need to give the inside of the house a thorough cleaning and mow the lawn. One of the baseball moms is coordinating and planning much of the party. Catered taco bar is on order from a local Mexican restaurant and I’ve fully stocked the drink reserves. Looking forward to the party with good friends that are very supportive of what I’m going through.

No real talk with W over the past few weeks. Primarily text messages only regarding the kids or horses. She’s been running hot and cold towards me. We both attended D4’s pre-k graduation show last week and W asked if I could stay a little longer in the classroom after the show. I did and our daughter appreciated it. I also texted her that I had decided that I’m taking the kids to California for a week and a half next month. I did not offer for her to join us. She replied she needed to think about that. I followed up a few days later and she said that was fine to take the kids on the trip. She also asked that we switch weekends with the kids so she could align with the weekends divorced BFF has her kids. I replied that is fine. W also regularly sends face emojis in her texts to me to express her feelings. Not reading anything into it as she probably does that with everyone. Two nights ago, W took the kids to divorced BFF’s place and they stayed there late on a school night. I always expect some spew from my W after she has been BFF. As such, last night, S8 had his first baseball all star practice, which I am coaching, and W offered to watch our D4. I replied that wasn’t necessary and that D4 can stay with me at practice. W replied “whatever”, I did not respond. Later in the evening she sends me a text apologizing as she keeps forgetting to bring a tool back to the house that I requested last week.

I’m trying to keep my focus and thoughts off of her and just live my life the way I want to while making the most of my time with kids. The mindset and actions continue to be leave her alone.

I need to get busy planning the detailed itinerary for the California trip with my kids. I want to make sure they have the time of their lives!!