Ok so question here, one of her comments to me when I asked about putting together a timeline to get the D moving was this: "Why are you in a hurry? Got wife #2 lined up already?"
I simply replied that I would like to see forward progress for my own health, and that I don't have wife #2 lined up already, because that isn't fair to anyone involved.
I'm sure I've read this before, but why do they throw the brakes on D so quickly? I mean this is her only goal in life since December, and now that I want to move forward instead of dragging my feet, she wants years to evaluate her finances and make sure we don't make a mistake financially? D is a financial disaster.
Well like Vapo said she probably wants to keep you on as Plan B. You've also done a pretty effective job of removing all pressure from her. You've handled yourself with dignity despite her terrible treatment of you and that may very well have her thinking that maybe you're not the demon she had convinced herself you were. But I think you are getting ahead of yourself inviting her to have these nice convos with you, for now you should really try and maintain as much distance as possible. Stick to "business only", just talk about kids hand-offs and such. It's too soon to try to reconnect with her.
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Her anger is still clouding her thinking ability. She still wants to punish me for everything, I believe anger is behind her actions to take the kids away, to kick me out in the way that she did, to fight over money so hard, etc. How long can one stay angry?
Yes this is exactly why I'm suggesting maintaining distance. She will be angry at you as long as you are present. Remove yourself from the equation and she'll eventually discover her anger was misplaced, that you are not in fact the root of all her unhappiness.
