Also you said if you knew she was in MLC pre-BD, you could have stopped it. Can you please elaborate?
I like a certain song lyric I've heard about patience: "Patience is a virtue / Until its silence burns you." Feels apropos to my sitch, probably to yours as well.
She's 41. What I said is if I had known pre-D filing I could have prevented the D filing. I was putting a lot of pressure on her to make up her mind which did not help. Her MLC would have happened anyway, her problem not mine to solve.
More than patience I am focusing on my own acceptance of the situation and letting go of control. Knowing I am helpless to do anything helps more than anything