Gentlemen. I sincerely appreciate your well thought out words. They are like medicine to my bones. I receive them.
We turned a corner this morning, and when I say that, I mean I confronted her about a phone number I have seen repeating for the last couple of months.
She had no leg to stand on. She admitted that after her AP re-connected with her in February she stopped talking but then got a call from a number in his area. She has consistently reached out to that number.
She confessed that this morning.
She asked me to come back after I dropped the kids at school. I am numb, so I planned to come back and simply listen to what she had to say.
She talked about being lonely, looking for something in this relationship that she knows is unhealthy, knows isn't right but was looking anyway.
I told her I had no reason to believe a word she says.
She said she was so sorry, asked what measures I wanted to take in light of this new behavior and I said nothing.
She asked me if I wanted her to leave, and I said I didn't know right now. I need some time to pray.
I know I can go back and read Sandi's thoughts on what to do now that she has at least admitted to pursuing this relationship still after 18 months.
But I am so confused. Men of faith, Steve, AnotherStander, I want God's heart in this decision. She is clearly making a decision with what she is doing. I told her I would not be disrespected like this.
Going forward I don't know what my play is here. I want to be married but she is gone. I don't want to hurt my kids but they can't live in this environment where everything she does is because she blames me for it. She has had the choice to NOT call anyone, NOT reach out to unhealthy places.
I have been lonely for 18 months. I have engaged in ZERO unhealthy relationships.
But I just don't know where we go from here.
si, first WWs are addicted to the AP. In my first sitch my W's EA was very hard for her to break away from. It took months for her to finally be over it. This is not that uncommon for them to struggle with breaking off all contact. I think if you give her time she can and will get past it.
"Going forward I don't know what my play is here." Sometimes the best play is no play at all. Slow, steady and patient wins the race. Give her some time. Take a deep breath. Breathe. Doing something rash will leave you with a lifetime of questions. Trust me on this.
M(53), W(54),D(19) M-23, T-25 Bomb Drop - Dec.23, 2017 Ring and Piecing since March 2018
