IW - I know man. Even if I ask a simple “how are you?” She comes back with this angry “I’m okay! HOW ARE YOU?!” Like basically don’t ask. I’m the devil. The seething anger behind her expressions and words. It is so screwed. I have to say... she’s doing a fantastic job propelling me towards wanting to be single dad.
Ok deep breath... I get that she needs to see me this way and go tell all her family and friends how I’m some terrible piece of sh*t human being to justify leaving. That the anger is the fuel she needs to exit the atmosphere. Today she’s angry that I spent some time playing with the kids before I leave for work travel tomorrow.
It just feels so disrespectful. And I get that the anger does that too... it drives me away. Guess what? At some point, I don’t deserve this treatment. Tell me you are thinking a lot about our future. Tell me ILYBINILWY. Stop acting like I’m a mental patient or a threat. I’m a person, the man you married, the man you had 3 kids with. Secret planning for months to bomb drop me? When it’s clear as day what you’re doing? Honestly, I don’t want this person in my life right now. I want to be alone with my kids. I want to be by myself. This woman is an alien to me.
