It’s ok to cry. We’ve all done lots - you’re not alone. In pretty good company IMO.
It’s healthy and much better than bottling it up.
Keep working on detachment and focusing on you. It gets easier, day by day, little by little.
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She still loves you, and even though she may look like the ice princess on the outside, on the inside she is really in a lot of pain and turmoil. She knows she's hurting you and the kids and she hates herself for it. But she feels desperate to escape and feels she is justified.
I hope that she wakes up and realizes the pain she is going to put our kids through. I still can't believe that she is willing to put me through it.
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None of that is going to change anything. You've got to let her go before she might want to come back.
I so hope this isn't true. I hope that I can win her back by showing how good of a husband I am.
It is good that you see the denial. Your post about one foot in the denial bucket is a good step; you are aware of the bucket, the fact that you are stepping out of it, and the mess it makes from all the sloshing around.
I do get the idea of wanting to win her back, to be the best husband possible. Sh74, those are noble and worth goals, do them for you. Become the best version of Sh74, for him. I am pretty sure he is worth the effort.
For a long time, I just can’t believe it, is very true. In time our language and use of it becomes self affirming; do be accurate, your mind is listening.
DnJ
Feelings are fleeting. Be better, not bitter. Love the person, forgive the sin.
