So, H just told me he ended the relationship with OW.
Yesterday I broke all the rules and pretty much told him exactly how hurt I was. Blame it on emotions, blame it on a fever- I'm not even sure of what I said, but I have never broken down like this before. He stopped arguing and just sat and listened, I could see the pain in his face. I told him I wanted him to leave, that I would not be disrespected like this in my own home any longer.
I worked 1/2 day yesterday because I am still pretty sick. This makes it much easier as I have spent the past few days in bed so there are few interactions. H made dinner, skipped the gym, and I could hear him telling our son to please keep the house quiet for me. I avoided any contact. Today I was cordial, bu did not engage in any conversation. H texted me at one point. I responded. He texted again, I ignored as it did not require a response.
Tonight, H told me after our conversation yesterday he called OW and they ended it. She's worried she'll lose her kids, blah blah blah. Of course he still claims it was not a PA, just friends, but I know better.
He states that he still thinks he should leave. He no longer feels comfortable here, he does not want to sweep things under the rug and move on. He is still not happy with the state of our marriage. I agree, I am not happy with the state of our marriage, and frankly, he shouldn't feel comfortable in our home right now.
As much as I want to save my marriage, I think perhaps my H needs time to go figure things out. I need to figure out what I want. For now I will continue to focus on me and hopefully GAL as soon as I recover from whatever illness this is! H is going away on business next week. I think it will be good for us. Wherever our journey leads us from here, it will be long, and it will be hard, but I will be ok.
