I appreciate the kind words even if I don't consider myself quite so advanced. I think that the most important thing I have learned is to be confident that I can ride out these low moments. When BD first happens it felt like they would swallow me up and I would never come out the other side. Now, I trust my ability to stay afloat despite the shifting tides.
I try not to dwell on OM mainly because I am disappointed in myself. I haven't been able to shake all of my anger towards him. I would love to be at a place of indifference, but I'm not there yet. It continues to bug me that close friends of mine still associate with him. I need to let that go. It's not my burden to carry.
Everything isn't quite finalized yet. I still need to draw up a quit claim deed to transfer the house out of EW's name, and then we need to go together to get it notarized, and I then I will write her a check to buy her out. I was going to pay her off in parts because it is a lot of money, but at this point I just want it to be over with and I can (barely) afford to do so. That said, I think the last two months of going through the divorce process have been harder than earlier because I have once again been forced to confront the old emotions and lingering ties in my head. Perhaps when it is completely done it will be easier?
W 34 Me 42 Married 7 years together 8 0 kids 1 beloved dog BD 4/6/2018 I moved out 4/7/2018 I moved back in alone 8/05/2018 I file 3/06/2019 D official 5/7/2019
