Persistent Endurance (Part 3)

[curtis7]

I don't think you can go dark without a parenting plan. I don't think you can go dark with her coming over to see the horse all the time. These kinds of things need to be ironed out.

Detachment means what they do doesn't affect you either way. I left the pictures up at my house b/c they didn't bother me usually and I thought maybe they'd bother my W to see them. But it's best to let most things like that become water off the duck's back. Keep posting, keep reading like LH said.

Hi O, parenting plan is worked out. We rotate 2,3,2 each week. This is going okay, but the house feels like an empty shell when the kids aren’t home. My S8 has actually stated several times that he doesn’t like going to her place and just wishes he could stay at home. I tell him I’m sorry about all of this, that it wasn’t caused by him or his sister, and hope that it’s only temporary before our family can get back together.

Regarding the horse situation, my neighbor had a friend that was in need of a place to keep her horse and we had an empty stall on our property. So, I decided to bring on a boarder at the beginning of May. I did clear it with my W because her horse is next to this one. She was ok with it initially, then very skeptical the next day thinking of ulterior motives of our neighbor, then ok with it again when I explained the arrangement and after she met the boarder. The basics are that I feed the boarder’s horse in the morning, then W feeds and cleans the stall when she comes over to take care of her horse every night. This setup is working for now, my W comes over and does her thing in the barn and sometimes rides her horse. The kids come in the house to play while my W will generally not step foot inside.

This past Friday, she did come in when I was out with the kids for the night to pack up more of her stuff. She took several storage containers of Xmas and other holiday decorations, several other decorative items around the house, and a few paintings off the walls. None of this really bothered me as it’s just stuff, although the hooks on the walls where some of the paintings and artwork used to reside looks a bit odd.

Our interaction is mostly limited to the kids and horses. She did text me on Friday asking if she should purchase the road hazard protection for her new tires. I gave my general opinion on those types of warranties with the caveat that it’s her decision and she should do what she thinks is best. She decided against it which I agreed with. On Saturday morning, I sent her a text offering to drop the kids at her place that night (they were scheduled to stay with me) so they could be there when she wakes up on Mother’s Day. She happily agreed. I took the kids to the store and allowed each of them to pick out a Mother’s Day gift for her. I also wrote her a note that I hope she has a good day and that the kids are lucky to have her as a mother. My S8 had a baseball game Saturday morning and my W took D4 to a birthday party. Afterwards, W brought D4 over for the rest of the day and she was wearing a white with black pinstripe dress, looking very good by the way. Same one she was wearing when she met up with OM for a hookup back in January. I suspect she was headed out to see one of her OM or on a date with someone new. I didn’t say anything, had a slight smile on my face, and let her go. No words or actions indicate she’s moving back towards me at all. I can’t worry about that, I need to keep moving forward for myself.

I’ve been busy working on a project at the house to prepare for my bday party in 2 weeks. I finally finished pressure washing, re-sanding, and sealing the pool deck. It’s a wet look sealer and really brought back the color of the paver blocks. It felt good to accomplish that project, time to select the next one to keep busy.