It seems like my sitch went from my W thinking she would never have an R with me again, to her now considering me a back up plan or something along that line. I guess this is progress but I don’t like being considered a plan B. Is the best course of plan to continue to detatch?
Definitely. Don't be cold and indifferent, the key is to lovingly detach. Sandi's rules are a great template on how to behave. You give her time and space but remain cordial and polite. You listen and validate when she wants to talk. But you don't pursue or look for reasons to be in her face all the time. And yes it is normal for a WAS to start to reach out when the LBS starts to detach.
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I’ve read that when the WW finally starts losing the LBS is when they can snap out of their fog? I understand this doesn’t happen in every sitch, thanks.
It's really unusual for a WAS to just snap out of it, and even when they do it's after some time has passed. Steve's is about the fastest turnaround I've seen, usually it takes at least a year. So yes what you say is true, but it takes a long time for them to feel like they are losing the LBS. Not weeks or months, much longer. And the LBS can't fake it, they have to really, genuinely be uninterested before it starts to affect the WAS.
