Last stages of divorce

[Rita]

Hamburg, I don't know if I missed something, but didn't your wife's MLC just start last year? This all seems to be moving so fast.

I would just caution you about falling in love with someone new when it has not even been a year. Your W threw everything away so quickly because she is not in her right mind. I would caution you about throwing everything away so quickly too! Even if you don't have any interest in restoring your M (and of course because I am Gerda, I would always encourage you to keep that door open!), I think it's really fast to start up with someone else.

I know I may seem like the nun around here, but I have had many temptations in the six years since BD. I know what it is like to feel that balm of attention and admiration and comfort and even seeds of love from someone else.

Whatever you choose for your future, you want to be whole and healed if you are going to have a new marriage (with someone new or with a restored W). It will be hard to truly heal if you jump quickly into something else. It soothes the wound and the pride for sure, it is a wonderful distraction, but it can be just as dangerous for you and for a new person in the long run if you don't fully heal first.