Mark I actually do empathize with the pain she's in, going through, and I support what she is doing or wanting to do with her life. Even though I don't agree with it. She is finally admitted to me that she's going through a soft midlife crisis. She actually wants to write a book about it and strikethrough the word crisis and call it transformation, transition, renovation or whatever she calls it.
It's not that I don't recognize or dismiss the changes and the pain that she's going through. I'm more than well aware of it and realize this is about her. Just for the hell of it because she looked really depressed and confused last week, I reached out to her last week and we had a good discussion about some of the her feelings and thoughts about moving forward with her new life, how she's going to do it what she wants to achieve a lot of dreams and goals she has....etc... I just have to make it a conscious effort to keep it at the forefront of my mind at all times. When I do I'm relaxed because it's not about me and I know it. I just shut up validated and listen.
However we all go back and forth with our thoughts and emotions and cycles individually in these situations. There is no wrong or right answer. People want to live their lives the way they want to live their lives and you can't control them, and I get that you just have to let them go. But what LBS on here wouldn't be a little bit hurt, a little bit pi$$ed, and a little bit critical at times? We wouldn't call it a "fog" if we didn't see it for what it was. Either way the fog is just a generalization and a theory, but a good one for all of us to make sense and find common ground with what we are experiencing in our spouses
