WAW - possibly WW

[ovrrnbw]

Just reading this the first time...

-Quit worrying about her facebook/social media.
-Why did you say

We did establish that nobody goes around our son until there is a legitimate serious relationship/over 1yr+.

? It seems like you basically OK'd her affair.
-Why did you buy a new car with her while she is having an affair?
-Don't worry about "demonstrating 180's". You'll just end up looking like a peacock strutting around and it may come off fake. Just worry about picking out your 180's and committing to them.
-Quit trying to fix her problems. She doesn't want you remember?
-Why are you paying her "child support"? Why not just have your child half the time and split expenses with her?
-I'm in the no gifts for cheaters camp.
-You showed up with your dad to help her move old furniture? What about OM? He can't help her? He's the man right? This kind of behavior is called "white-knighting" and is solid friend zone behavior. You should be busy moving forward/GAL if requests like this are made.
-Quit discussing your situation with this mutual friend. Period.
-Let her do the work on the separation/divorce side. Her choice so she can lead the charge and pay the associated fees. -You're trying to fix every problem she presents to you and you let her make your feel bad about all her problems.
-Get off the dating site. You're not ready, not even close. Also, maybe you forgot, you're married and supposedly trying to save your marriage.



Now, I see some positives in your overall attitude and mindset. Keep that going. Don't push the separation unless that's what you want. Get the parenting plan in writing. What is it now? It should be 50/50. Just text/email her and be as succinct as possible. When you see your son, you should take him out. Don't hang out at your W's place, you need to get some space from her IMO. If there's no court order that your W gets full custody then I don't know why you are letting her call all the shots on when you get to see him. He should be staying with you half the time.

Use fewer words when you interact with her. Read R2C links on attraction. They will help you a lot.