Hit by the dreaded ILYBNILWY part 2

[IHCLACS]

I think a lot of us here with our situations being someone on the same timeline, we're all getting closer and closer to being 100% done. It's almost like they distance, then we distance some more, then they retreat even more. then we retreat. Then they break trust, then we break trust, they move closer and closer to being done and then so do we. I was just telling Wolman. it's kind of like what the hell is the incentive or point of even sticking around? Other than rebuilding ourselves and giving them and us time and space to see if minds and hearts will change? even if they did how could trust ever be restored with it always being in the back of your mind if it was?

[Ready2Change]

I had one of my buddy's stay with me after he left is wife. He worked a different shift, so we didn't see him much, but he constantly cleaned the house. Best roommate ever.

[mikeyb]

I had one of my buddy's stay with me after he left is wife. He worked a different shift, so we didn't see him much, but he constantly cleaned the house. Best roommate ever.

That's basically how it's gonna be. We both work at the same place, same days, just he's overnight and I'm days. Just don't want to overstay my welcome as it's him and his wife that are allowing me to stay, so I'll be putting the pedal to the metal on saving, try and do some ubering (smaller market in his area so hopefully I can, he's closer to our work. Whereas I'm currently right beside tampa) to make up some extra cash-flow. Also starting a small hobby/business doing vinyl decals, got a hold of a cricut machine for pretty cheap. in which me and him may both go in on doing it, we shall see.

[mikeyb]

Been a few days since I've posted so decided to check in. Not a whole lot has been going on, gave my landlord notice that I intend to move out at the end of the month and am working on packing up my stuff in the house. I've been getting in some overtime at work right now because my boss quit a week ago and I have been filing in and handling the ins and outs of my department. The days have been long but I'm taking it as much as I can if they will allow me.

The good thing about it I guess is, I was basically given a one day crash course into the paperwork of my department and have been managing it for the last week, so far upper management and the other department managers have been telling me that I've been doing a great job with everything. Several of the managers have even asked me if I am going to put in for manager job when it gets posted. It is something I'm thinking about.

[mikeyb]

So I'm feeling pretty great right now! As I'm packing my stuff up I see this chapter closing and a new one beggining. So much that the other day my W had called me and asked me to set up a fire stick for her. I had agreed at that point. But packing up and closing out this chapter has changed my mind. So I sent her a text that said this:

"Don't bother with the fire stick. I've decided i need to stop being here 'When you need me'. You were not here for me when I needed you the most and you haven't been here for me for a very long time. I don't know why I cared to make myself so available to you whenever you needed me these last 6 months when all you have brought me is nothing but pain. I'm putting an end to that now. I can't get past you if I still make myself available to you"

Hitting the send button I felt so much relief!!!

[ovrrnbw]

Quite the mouthful for someone who is moving on. I say you are progressing but not over it. Good luck mikey I still read your thread.

[mikeyb]

Quite the mouthful for someone who is moving on. I say you are progressing but not over it. Good luck mikey I still read your thread.

Oh don't get me wrong, I know I am not over it. I still get thoughts of R, but at the same time I don't really think I could go through with R if it ever came to it, but I've felt obligated to be there for things she needed and while packing it was like reality started to sink in and I thought. Why am I doing this to myself, why do I still try to please her and be there to help her when she hasn't been there for me when I need her. So in that moment I decided to cut that rope.

[IHCLACS]

Mikey I've been doing a lot of these actions in IHS. Although it hasn't been helping with W, it has been getting me back my self-respect. If that's what helps you move forward given all that you perceive your W hasn't done for you, then so say run with it. Let them see the other side of the coin of all the things they said we didn't do for them, or tool for granted. Good for you for having a pair of Ball$

[ovrrnbw]

I think we move on in stages. Most of us dont fly through it. But if you were able to be there to help her a bit it probably shows some detachment progress. There were times when inflation ignored my W bc I was so hurt. But allowing her to continue to hurt me was my own fault. I say you're doing better than I was at this stage.

[mikeyb]

I think we move on in stages. Most of us dont fly through it. But if you were able to be there to help her a bit it probably shows some detachment progress. There were times when inflation ignored my W bc I was so hurt. But allowing her to continue to hurt me was my own fault. I say you're doing better than I was at this stage.

Thanks ovrrnbw, I know I still got a ways to go. I think once I land in my own place the real progress will begin. I'm shooting for mid-end july. That's my goal, no more than 2 months at my friend's house.