180 Counterproductive?

[oops13]

Ran into her unexpectedly which turned into an R talk that I didn't even want when she asked about vacation. I learned some things, but it certainly wasn't worth it.

I have a horrible feeling about her IC. It seems like her IC is almost trying to split us up and she's never even met me. Shes suggested separation and has apparently encouraged her to consider moving out. W says she has resisted this because she wants us to make it and have a good marriage. She said she's looking for a new job and is trying to avoid OM because I brought him up before, and it's making her paranoid being around him and working with me. She keeps insisting shes "trying". This built up into her head as an ultimatum to "move out or be a wife" and I said no, that's not the case, I didn't want her to move out and I definitely don't expect her to be a perfect wife or anything close to it right now. I told her I simply felt like I was the only one who wanted the marriage. She said that she does want it and is doing her best but said her mental health issues allow no room for stress right now. I was calm and maintained composure at least. I could tell she shut down by the end of it.

I kept my composure and didnt beg or anything, but I didn't even want to have this talk, it was my responsibility to prevent it and I failed. Ready for my 2x4s. This is even worse if she's really that stressed out. I just really have no idea what I'm dealing with here. Even without my own stupid mistakes.