Its a process. I was exactly where you were from June till September of 2018. Same scenario. ILYBINILWY, but mine was having an affair with a kid 10 years younger. This is about them, not you. Reflect on any of your short comings you may have had in the marriage. Fix those and do it for yourself, not her or winning her back. I tried that 5 years ago, and still ended up with her having an exit affair. Tried reconciling beginning of FEB 19, but it has to be a 2 person task. Take care of yourself as when it happened to me my job sufferred (almost fired due to performance), my health (lost 30 lbs since i could eat i was so sick to my stomach and couldnt sleep). It will get better regardless of what path your situation takes.
Start by following the 37 rules listed in this forum, they really will work. And if you do start loosing wieght, use that as motivation to begin an exercise program. When you feel better about yourself, others take notice and your confidence will pick back up.
